My July Long Weekend

by Lewis

Well, my humans abandoned me again this weekend. But to my total amazement and joy (I never know what I'm doing from one day to the next) I got to spend the weekend with my surrogate humans, Rico and Christine. It turns out that this is some sort of holiday weekend, as there are all these red and white flags everywhere I look... even though I only see in black and white, I am pretty sure they are red.

So I go for a visit to Rico's place – which I LOVE, not just because I get treats and lots of attention, but because I have a big, grassy yard to roll around on! Even better, there was this new thing in the back filled with water! I wasn't really sure about it at first, but after I tested it by dropping my ball into it, I was in heaven!

Normally, when I get left behind, I have to spend all day locked inside, waiting for someone to come home and take me out for a pee. Not this weekend though! We spend the entire time (ok, except my sleeping time) outdoors! I played ball for hours on end, and just when I thought things were getting boring, another doggie came over with some more humans. I don't know much about them, but the doggie who owns them was a scruffy-looking thing that Rico called a “Labra-doodle”. Something they called a designer breed that's not supposed to shed – whatever. I tried humping her anyways. That wasn't very popular. We stayed outside until it was time for me to go to bed, and I went inside to my special carpet to sleep - man, I had great sleeps there. Normally, I get up at around 6:30 am or so, and see if I can roust someone. Sometimes, I stick my wet nose in their face to get a reaction. If that doesn't do the trick, a big, sloppy tongue always works. But on this stayover, I was sleeping in late - Rico had to wake me up and drag me out of bed for my morning constitutional.

The next day, we took my car and went for a ride over to some place (I never know where we are going, as I sleep in the back). We get there, and I run around, pee on things and try to poop when Rico doesn't have one of his silly poop bags with him. I leave those things there for a reason – doesn't he know that by now? So we walk around on these trails for a while, but I can tell Rico is getting hot and tired, so we get back into the car and go to someplace called “Dundarave” and I sit on the sidewalk, waiting for hot chicks to cruise by. Nothing. Only humans with silver hair. This sure isn't like the old days when, my human and I would meet hotties on South Granville. I would impress them with my tricks and natural-born, killer good looks. Anyhow, after Rico and Christine eat (and give me nothing, of course), we ride back home, and Rico and I play in the pool. This time for dinner, some other humans come over, but this time, they bring a mini-human. I wasn't sure about this, but I tried to hump it anyways. Rico didn't like that. Maddie (as he is called) turned out to be ok, as he spent a lot of time playing with me. His throwing arm sucks however. Another late night, and I am pooped out – literally!

The following day was more of the same – except we spent a lot more time around the thing with the water. I love playing with the ball in the water, but one of my balls wouldn't float, and I would spend hours pawing at it under the water. Even more interesting, is the fact that there is a bunny next door. I would spend hours sitting on my favourite spot on the deck and watch the bunny in the cage. I couldn't believe that I was so close to the bunny! Every time it would move, I would jump! Of course, I would still pester Rico and Christine with my ball, and if that didn't work, I would pant in their faces (I know my breath smells, but yours would too if you could lick your own bum!). For some strange reason, Rico poured out all of the water, and put it away.

On the last day of my best weekend ever, we took another long ride in my car to someplace called “Belcarra”. It was hot, but we got to a green, grassy park by the ocean. Rico and Christine ate (and again, offered me nothing except water and frozen water). But I got to play fetch in the ocean – I love the water. I met an 8-week old Labrador-Husky cross... he was scared to go in the water, so I showed him how. Some small humans were throwing balls in the water for me, but for some reason, they didn't float, so I couldn't find them. We got back in the car and went to visit my friend, Paddington, although I think I scare him a bit. Wuss.

There you have it – best weekend ever. Well, there was that weekend that I spent the entire time humping Bailey. That's another story.

Lewis